FOOL’S GOLD

“I Am Taking A Break From Social Media”

Dear followers, it is with a heavy heart I announce that I will be taking an indefinite hiatus from Instagram, and this may be the last post you see from me in a long time. My decision, like the previous hiatuses this year, comes from concern for my own mental and emotional well-being. Social media is toxic. But I don’t need to tell you that – see for yourself. My post earlier this week with Greta Ivers (@GI_hoe), amassed only 456 likes. 456. Even typing that number is like an iron-toed boot kicking me in the ovaries over and over and over again. But I am resilient. As you know from my Instagram stories over the past few months, Greta and I have been on shaky terms, to say the least, and I have been practicing mindfulness to steady myself.

Mindfulness is acknowledging your faults. What faults do I possess? I am too trusting. I am too eager to see the good in people, to believe that everyone has a beautiful light within them just waiting to shine through. I believed that Greta Ivers was my friend. I first met her in the bathroom of The Low Bar at a rush event for the Zeta Tau Alpha sorority. I was washing my hands and just about to leave when a girl burst in, sobbing and dry heaving. It was a mess. I mean that quite literally, as before asking what was wrong, I spotted the brown Rorschach shape morphing on her white jeans. As I soon learned between each dramatic death rattle of a sob, Greta Ivers had shit herself from taking one (1) popper. I instinctually laughed to lighten the mood and told her to stand still for a quick second so I could take a Snapchat of her as a sisterly bonding moment. But I could see that wasn’t helping the situation.

Frankly, Greta was overreacting in this scenario but I remembered the lessons Pastor Robert taught me and put myself in her white (now partly brown) Vans. We were both freshmen and rushing the same sorority – the very same which was hosting this event where the president and rush chairs were attending. So, instead of recoiling at the stench of a recently vacated Chipotle burrito bowl, I offered to help. My then boyfriend, Thomas Woodly, lived in a house just a few doors down from the bar and I told her I would get her a shirt from his room to cover up with and sprinted out of the bathroom. After socializing with the rush chairs and several other sisters over a few vodka Red Bulls, I had the courage and gymnastic ability to dislodge the screen in Thomas’s window and crawl into his room. To be honest, this situation was mutually beneficial for both me and Greta: she got a shirt to cover herself up with, and I got to get rid of Thomas’s stupid Dragonball Z t-shirt.

But followers, why am I telling you this story? Why am I reflecting on this intimate moment between two (supposed) friends? Because Greta Ivers fucked my boyfriend. Thomas Woodly has long since been blocked on all social media fronts and I have deleted every picture of us which does not correctly capture my angles. Unbeknownst to me and Greta, Thomas was apparently getting busy in the Chi Omega house and contracted gonorrhea. In hindsight, creating and propagating the nickname “McClap” for Greta was a bit cruel, as I recently learned in a social awareness seminar I attended. But you, too, followers are also accountable as you voted in my Instagram poll between that nickname and “Gone(orrhea) Girl.” We both have a lot to learn, but I especially encourage you all to take a look at yourselves and then follow my social justice account @thebespoke_woke.

I am a forgiving person, and the least I could do was post a picture with Greta to show that any bridge can be mended. Imagining such an altruistic post would be my most liked of the month, and perhaps even go viral and end up on Ellen, I was crushed to see how few of you appreciate basic human kindness. To be completely honest, my faith in humanity has been shaken to its core and I need to take the time to focus on myself and my own priorities right now. I will be documenting this undertaking on my Wordpress blog should those of you who care about real life and real experiences want to take this journey with me. My fitness, dog, fashion, and rosé pages will still stay up during this time, so I will see who likes this post, and who doesn’t. I think we all can do better.